"I'm Not Superstitious. I'm just a little Stitious." - Michael Scott

"I Am Fast. To Give You A Reference Point I Am Somewhere Between A Snake And A Mongoose… And A Panther." - Dwight K. Shrute

"Sometimes, when I close my eyes I can no longer see" - Old Welsh Proverb

"I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're goin', and hook up with them later." - Mitch Hedberg

"You're about as sharp as a marble" - My Uncle Vinny

"Your mind is like someone emptied the kitchen junk drawer onto a trampoline." - Fortune Cookie

"If you shake hands with someone covered in shit, you're going to get shit on your hands - Dear Leader Rhys Waters

"I'm on a Keto diet" - Jesse Harley (Inventor of the Keto Diet drinking game)